Rhapsody in White

*steps on soapbox*
Boy meets girl. Boy falls madly in love with girl. Girl loves boy with all her heart. Boy asks girl to marry him. Girl says yes and they eventually get married. Boy, now husband, finds his one true love and is with the person that makes him happiest. Boy suddenly becomes a figure of hate and a sellout amongst his people.

How could this happen? In a society where it's all too commonplace for the media to dictate tips and tricks to find a relationship that works for you, how could we project this man as an outcast and single him out? I left out a minor detail: boy is black, girl is white. I've heard associates of mine on all levels speak out on their objection to racial mixing, and I begin to wonder where it is centered. Nowhere in the Bible does it say that they are not to mix, there is no law prohibiting it, nor is it something that is forced on you. Yet, there is this underlying stigma that comes with black men dating white women.

I have dated white women before, both locally and internationally, and save a few natural physical features, there is nothing that a white woman is not capable of accomplishing that a black woman can. I personally think that the black woman is the greatest thing God created and treat my women like queens, but the concept of this relationship structure that we are in is VERY confusing. MTV's True Life had an episode called "True Life: I'm an Interracial Dater" that had a very pretty black woman, whose occupation was a stripper, who was madly in love with this white guy. They were used to the taunts and the black guys trying to spit game to the woman by belittling her boyfriend, who eventually became her fiance'. They even developed a scheme to use it to make money. She would come out and dance, and the black guys would tip. Her man would walk his white self up to the stage and throw dollars himself. Not to be outdone, the black guys would throw out MORE money to outhustle him, but at the end of the day, all the money went to the both of them.

Hearing Kerry Washington's objection to Julia Stiles' relationship with Sean Patrick Scott in Save the Last Dance somewhat lifted the cloud. I don't remember it word for word, but I think it was something to the tune of having a GOOD black man going to date a white woman was like there was one less good black man for the black woman to date. I understand and respect the mind of people with that mindstate, but the thing that makes me angry is when people are hard up on one thing and do not even consider alternatives. The woman on True Life said "I don't like black guys and I would never date one." That upset me a great deal. Made me feel like I had some terminal disease that I was sure to infect her with, should she be seen with me. I know I'm a good man, and I will be an asset to whatever woman I choose to cultivate a relationship with. I prefer to date African-American women, but I'm not opposed to fraternizing with white women. A good woman is a good woman, simple and plain. A good man is a good man, simple and plain.

Take this scenario: say there was a woman who was rather fair-skinned. Got all the societal benefits and hate of being a white woman, and she got with a black man. Then one day, she announces to the world somehow that she's actually a fair-skinned African American. Does your perception of her change, and the relationship suddenly become validated? If so, do you see a problem in the logic, or is logic even to be considered in matters of the heart? Somebody explain, cuz it just doesn't make sense.
*steps off soapbox and goes home to beautiful, black woman*

-B